Thursday, January 26, 2006 | 4:54 AM

There isnt much time to blog nowadays! I rmb that my very early entries were like extremely long (if I only could have written that much for my econs test) and regardless of the content, I missed the times when I can sit down in front of the com and type away without having to worry about homework. Now, I prefer to upload photos and just let them take up a thousand words each.

It is as if life's little luxuries are all evaporating away.

It is different in JC2. Just like how Sec 3 and 4 are I guess. Suddenly, the threats and worries about us not doing well for academics are becoming seriously real. Gaining knowledge is a very fun and interesting process, and to me, all the stuff we learn seem to tell me a little more about how people ( be it the people who made the theories, the lecturers who are presenting, and even our tutors), we see a little of the world from their eyes when they pass their knowledge to us. You see the exuberance they exhibit when they are describing certain reactions or explaining certain laws. That is because they do believe in those theories and equations, and that they are glad that your question opens up the wolrd of their subject more.

I have heard that people say it is a joy to teach ( erm... ok..) but I think it is more of a luxury and joy to learn. Not only about the subject but of the people around you. While there is the issue of what is the point of learning what you don't like, still to me, I think, any knowledge is useful in its own way.

Which reminds me. After CNY, I believe it is gona be a fast gallop all the way till A levels. There will be no more time to smell the flowers, take a breather. School, I believe, will lose its appeal to me then. Yet again, the inevitable sense of unpreparedness, the anxiety, the endless cramming of knowledge. And after that, the inevitable sense of parting, of separation. And so, assumnig that we move on to universities, the last phase of almost everyopne's student life, and then..

We shall be thrown out into the socitey. We will then be labeled as adults.

I once mentioned that I don't want to grow old. And teach said, one doesnt have to grow old, but one has to grow up. And this is the very thing I find myself not wanting to let go off. It ties in with some other views that I have. It is really scary how much responsbilities adults have, and I am afraid of having to live a life where everything is for real. Tests, homework now translated into projects, presentations, annual staff evaluations. I dont want all those freedom spoken off by my generation. What is the point of being free of I am not going to be happy?

My point is, I dont think I will be a happy adult. Maybe I will be a kidult or something. Is this a reason why people become teachers? So that they can remain connected to a student life? Doesnt it make things more painful living youth through someone else?

Sigh.

I think I oughta catch up on my sleep.

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