Tuesday, February 07, 2006 | 1:30 AM

Sort of found out why I am in such a bad mood of sorts recently. There was this feeling wanting to say something to correct what people say about me, recently, but today, everything just went bust. Maybe it was the heat which sped up the boiling process but whatever it was, it was horrid. Suddenly, I just couldnt be bothered anymore.

All those observations Hooper made about him, are used as ammunition, used at battering rams, as the last nail in the coffin to break Kingshaw down. No matter how untrue they can be, who cares? GP has been talking about prejudice and discrimination, especially about the need about making assumptions of people, about categorising them, about observing them. The irony is, me, whom should know most about , believed some of the untruths, or in the very least, the murky descriptions.

Of course it can be said that I wouldnt know how others see my behavior. It is true. But when one makes comments, descriptions about another, it can fall into the range of being extremely wrong, somewhat correct or maybe even, hitting the nail on the head or something. Still, it is unsettling, uncomfortable to be told certain things about yourself when you didnt ask for such stuff, when out of the blue, people suddenly seem intent on reading you and telling out loud the contents. Usually I can handle it. I do this too, but I only say those things when I want to make reference to a behavior and when I am asked. I dont want it to be some "do you know you tend to be.." trivia in which questions are set on me everyday. There was this question in GP about blogs. The grp doing it mentioned something about the exhibition like quality about it.

Well, I thnk the word "exhibition" is the key. In exhibitions, artists out up their work and ppl can look at it whatever way they want but they cant feedback directly to the artist and tell the artist what to do, how that scene could have been improved, or even how-to-paint-the-damn-picture. Or even better, cornering the artist into a corner and attempting to have a discussion on why the sun is red in his picture.

But what I am also trying to say is, I think it is true tt sometimes when ppl make assumptions abt you and then tell you to do certain things, you may intentionally dont do it. Or for some, if they dont like the way you ask them, they wont do it. For me, just stop telling me who I am. You can tell me how you see me as a person, but I dont think we can ever confidently say, of another person, who he is, for we will never know enough of the person to say that.

Ignorance is once again bliss.

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