Monday, January 23, 2006 | 5:39 AM

It is amazing how fast and swiftly hatred kills. Like a viper, it silently uncoils from the depths of your soul, twists its body around it, ensnaring you. Striking so suddenly that the ferocity of your spite surprises even yourself. Like smoke, catches the light and reflects it off to other parts of your mind, poisoning your sanity, till your dislike for someone grow into something so intense, it clouds your vision, choking your lungs with toxic fumes.

Like fire, consuming your spirit, so painful it is to hate someone and to be hated, with charred flesh a reminder, that never can one be totally freed from it.

It was never someone whom I simply disliked. Sometimes, I get very close to hating it. And today, I saw its cursed soul in someone else. We are never free from our hatred for what we hate does exist in the depths of other people around you. And everyday, I get reminded of its foul pressence and again, my soul burns and writhes and thirsts for the extermination of it so that I can be sane again.

How can I still not let it go? While I seem to be just fooling around, rage burns, and I so hope that at somewhere else, it can feel the unknown fear of being hated by something unknown.

On a less intense note, feeling something is not a deliberate thinking process. I don't intentionally search someone's face trying to do a facial-emotion analysis. People usualy ( I think) can just feel it. And I dont really have a choice over whether I want to see or sense how someone is feeling. Actually, it is a natural thing which all humans are equipped with so that they can be more considerate and sensitive to other people's feelings.

I am not a freak.

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